Remember, we have to approach those gorgeous shoes in a store to see if we actually like ‘em before we buy ‘em. INSTEAD, we’ve got to turn the tables: Do I like HIM? Do I like the way HE looks? Does he seem cool, smart, and interesting?īecause the reality is we get to CHOOSE who we want to approach and talk to, and we’re not at someone else’s whim to let them decide if we’re good enough. While this is normal, it’s also ass-backward. What will he think? Does he like me? Am I pretty enough/cool enough/sexy enough? Is this that bad dream where I’m suddenly naked? From “Does he like me?” to “Do I like HIM?”īecause dating can be so sensitive and intimate–I mean, our egos are on the line–we tend to turn into these puddles of insecure goo when it comes to thinking about approaching someone else.
THE GUY THAT HOW TO
(For the fitness side of how to be the sexiest woman alive, check out this article on that very topic.)ġ. Today, I’m going to show you how to be the most confident woman in the room by making an effortless approach, dazzling him with conversation, and THEN deciding whether or not you want to take the goods home with you, so to speak. Now, what if our fictional Bloomingdale’s is a bar or event you’re going to tomorrow night where you could meet an incredible guy? If not? It goes right back on the shelf and she goes on her merry way. Only AFTER asking those questions does she give it a green light.
She holds it in her hand, looks it over, feels the material.ĭoes she have outfits to wear it with? Are the shoes the right size? Are they comfortable?
She goes over to whatever draws her attention, and she inspects it carefully. Bat my eyelashes, flip my hair, and these lovely items will come right to me.” The analogy I like to think about is this: when a woman walks into Bloomingdale’s, she doesn’t stand back and look at all the gorgeous clothes and go: “I’ll just wait right here. How else are you going to know if he’s interesting or not? Obviously, it’s for the reasons above but it also comes back to the belief that a guy doing all the work is just how we do things.īut it doesn’t have to be some aggressive, slutty move to approach that cute guy at the gym, and it shouldn’t be weird to talk to a guy at a bar. You’d be amazed by how often attractive guys wonder why they don’t get approached by more women. Instead, I met the love of my life by taking the taboo approach. It’s like watching the life you thought you were supposed to have casually drift by without a second glance.īut what would have been even sadder is if back on that cruise ship, I had decided to just go to sleep that fateful night. She thinks, “What am I going to say?” “Am I going to sound like the lamest person who ever lived?” “Is there something in my teeth?” “Am I a whore now?”Īnd so she lets the guy who might be a great date-which could turn into an amazing relationship-simply walk away without ever knowing what might’ve happened. A friend of mine says she eyes good-looking guys all the time, yet she immediately stops herself from even thinking about approaching them. It can be perceived as aggressive, weird, desperate, or even slutty. This is for a slew of unfortunate reasons. While this seems like a simple question with an A or B answer, the truth is… It’s HARD for women to actually approach a group of people, let alone a guy they’re interested in talking to. I saw a group of people, and (unbeknownst to me) was faced with one of the most important decisions of my life: was I going to go back to my room and go to sleep like a grandma or was I going to be brave and approach this person? I was on a cruise ship, walking around by myself late at night. I still remember the night I met my fiancé.